Q: Who the heck are you?
We're Loco Luna. Among other things, we make Lava Gourmet Hot Sauce. Would you care to BUY SOME ? You can read more ABOUT US on the page of the same name.

Q: How did I get here?
Can't help you there.

Q: Where can I buy Lava Gourmet Hot Sauce in a retail store?

Glad you asked!  CLICK HERE for a full listing of grocery and other retail stores where you can buy some Lava Sauce!

Q: Where else can I buy Lava Gourmet Hot Sauce ONLINE?

Again, glad you asked!  CLICK HERE for a full listing of and direct links to online stores where you can buy some Lava Sauce!

Q: How did chile peppers get here?
There's evidence that suggests Native Americans were cultivating chiles before Columbus landed in the New World. There's documentation, too. The Spanish settlers in Mexico wrote about how chiles were a fundamental part of the natives' diet – and even their social and religious structure. Anyone who's ever tried Lava Sauce knows that it has been known to bring people closer to God, so you can no doubt appreciate our ancestors' zeal.

Q: Is hot sauce good for me?
Hmm... Eat Lava. Live longer. Hot sauce for your health? Sounds crazy, but it just might work. Here's why:

Endorphins: Gain from the pain. The heat from chile peppers causes your body to release endorphins. Aside from being a natural pain killer, they're also responsible for that inexplicably giddy feeling you get after running a marathon. If you were crazy enough to run 26.2 miles, that is. The nice thing about eating Lava Sauce is that, unlike with running, there's no chafing.

Vitamins: Mom would be proud. Read the label on your bottle of daily supplements, and then throw them in the trash. Whether hot sauce is easier to swallow is debatable, but there's no question that it's packed with many of the same nutrients you've been forcing yourself to take in broccoli form.

Antibacterial Chemicals: Kill bad stuff. We don't suggest that you sprinkle some Lava Sauce on that week-old casserole, but it's nice to know that when you eat hot sauce it's been naturally “pre-screened” for certain bacteria. Basically, chilies scorch the bejeebers out of anything in their way. But let's not get too technical.

Low Carbs: Pretend like it matters. Actually, for a lot of people, every carb counts. So anyone who's searching for great taste on a low-carb budget should be glad to know that each serving of Lava Sauce is virtually carb-free.

Q: What is Capsaicin?
Capsaicin is the oil in chile peppers that gives them their heat. People actually have charts and scales for measuring the intensity of their favorite peppers. We know where they're coming from.

Q: Who is William Scoville?
William Scoville was a scientist. We like to think of him as sort of a Pavlov for pepper lovers. We also like to call him “Mad Bill,” but that's another story. Anyway, Scoville put some “subjects” through a bunch of tests – where he basically made them eat chile peppers, observed their spastic flailings and cries for mercy, then rated their... er... responses. What he ended up with was a measurement of heat called the SCOVILLE HEAT UNIT (or SHU) system. This is not to be confused with the Loco Luna Wussiness Gauge (or LLWG), which is less scientific.

Q: I'd like to buy more Lava Sauce than any normal person could consume in a year. Can I do that?
We're glad you asked. Of course you can. In fact, you can purchase two bottles or a battleship full of Loco Luna products. RIGHT THIS WAY.

Q: Why are chiles called “peppers”?
We'd like to thank “The Whole Chile Pepper Book” for the historical reference, but you can thank Christopher Columbus for the answer. Seems Mr. Columbus was as adept at identifying spices as he was at discovering India. Which is to say, not very. He mistook chilies for black pepper, thus incorrectly naming them.

Q: My kid is driving me nuts. Can you help me?
No. Loco Luna is certainly no authority on child development or discipline. We can, however, reference “The Whole Chile Pepper Book”once again - where cases of chilies used in punishment are documented – for anthropological purposes only, of course. Parents, for example, made their unruly kids inhale the smoke from roasting chiles. Some people might consider this more like aromatherapy than cruel or unusual punishment.

Don't for get to check out the new ARTICLES AND INFORMATION pages for more great chile pepper and hot sauce information!

How hot is our Sauce?
Here is a visual taste test.

See the SCOVILLE CHART for how
hot chile peppers really are.

See the SCOVILLE CHART for how
hot chile peppers really are.

This ain't your ordinary hot sauce.